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Romp: for modern kids. This is an actual sign for an actual store in Park Slope. Every time I walk by it, it drives me nuts. "For modern kids"? What does that even mean? Do we really need a specialty store for "modern kids"? It’s true this is Park Slope, home to the stroller mafia, but come on.
Do we actually need to specify that there’s a store for the modern kid? Are there kids running around looking for suspenders and bonnets to wear?
"Hi, do you sell saddle shoes and poodle skirts?"
"Umm, did you read the sign? This is for modern kids, duh."
To be honest, I’m not even sure what they sell. I don’t think it’s a clothing store, I think it’s just weird toys and stuff. I don’t know, maybe it’s just me, but it seems like you’re completely dumping on a whole demographic of old-fashioned kids that probably walk by your store and cry or something.
Eff Romp. I’m going to open my own children’s store and it’s going to be called Sit Down & Be Quiet: for old-fashioned kids. Take that.
—admin
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