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Hey ladies, having trouble rubbing one out? Give Eva Longoria a call, she’s got boxes and boxes of vibrators that she’s just dying to teach you how to use. [IDLYITW]- Kate Beckinsale says she wants to quite the U.S. Admits she’s not exactly "conquering" Hollywood. Releases Underworld: Evolution today as proof. [A Socialite’s Life]
- Unclie Louis G’s subversive plan to hide their benches from all the meddling old people that try and sit on them, or that would try and sit on them if there were actually old people in Park Slope. [RNWA]
- Exactly why Craigslist is the most useful tool on the internet. But anyone that would trade a lime Lifesaver for an Orange one is nuts. Lime is the bomb. [OTBKB]
- Jossip hates bagels. I’m sure they’d be happy if we went back to the 1800’s when bagels weren’t even allowed out of the kitchen. Anti-bagelites. We’ll never forget the giant bagel wreck of 1938 when 5 trucks carrying seperate kinds of bagels inadvertantly creating, the Everything bagel. [Jossip]
- Still more Frey lies. I bet I’ve drank and done more drugs than this lying freak has. [Gawker]
- Christ, Brangelina’s spawn isn’t even born yet and it’s responsible for more good deeds than I’ve done in my lifetime. [Popsugar]
- Yay! It’s the beginning of "awards screener piracy season". The time we get the chance to finally see all those Oscar nominated films we never got the chance to see while they were in theatres. [Defamer]
- Jessica Simpson took a beating from someone. Either that or she had some fucked up plastic surgery. [Yeeeah!]
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