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We are really glad that Paris Hilton isn’t too interested in being a responsible human being who pays bills on time because, now, we have countless reasons to love and respect her.
Take this picture, for instance. It’s a perfect example of how clever Paris is. I would never even think to “smoke” a tampon. That’s probably because I am not 13 and think periods are embarrassing. Therefore, I don’t have to make jokes about the fact that I have to carry them around. (For those of you who still haven’t figured it out, James obviously wrote this post). Further, I don’t know anyone over the age of 20 who thinks tampons are inherently funny; I guess that’s what makes Paris so charming in a child-like way.
Thanks to Page Six, because we don’t want to pay to see it on parisexposed.com, we have a list of the other interesting items found in the storage unit.
* Prescription bottles for Hydrocodone, a painkiller similar to OxyContin used to manage anxiety disorders, post-party sleep aid Ambien and the herpes medication Valtrex.
* A medical bill from a Los Angeles clinic, billing an “Amber Taylor” - with the same birth date as Paris - for a miscarriage in March 2003.
* A journal analyzing her booze-fueled dreams.
* Her reality TV co-star Nicole Richie’s University of Arizona ID card.
* Sister Nicky’s Nevada marriage certificate.
* Several bank statements, including one with an ending monthly balance of just $9.26.
* Home videos she shot of visits with her sick grandmother.
* To-do lists that include an assortment of errands, including a reminder to buy Christmas gifts.
Among the countless hours of naked Paris footage are some sexy videos of Paris shot by Girls Gone Wild‘s Joe Francis. (We just really wanted to mention him three times in one day). Some of the highlights include Paris taking off her bikini top, Paris in a bubble bath while he, because this is the only way he knows how to talk to women, begs her to show her body and Paris hosing off the bubbles.
From this video, it would seem like they were friends. Right? Well, while he wasn’t around, she called Joe Francis a, “rich loser.” Isn’t that the pot calling the kettle black?
PARIS’ SECRET TRASHER CHEST [New York Post]
—Elizabeth
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One Comment
1. Lale
Want a neat little picture by your comments? Get one here.Whoa Whoa Whoa. Are you telling me that Nicole Richie went to college? That’s the most shocking thing of all. And a fine institution like AZ State…
That Paris is one classy bitch. I’d make her change her last name if I was running the Hilton Hotel. Or I would make a motel chain with her name on it that would rival the Super 8 in its posh factor.
Posted Friday, January 26, 2007 at 2:33 am | Permalink
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