Metadish, Fresh from NYC

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On special occasions, we remember that Britney Spears does, in fact, have two. This is one of those rare moments. We were wondering where the hell she’s been these past two days. We assumed she just had a hangover. Turns out, she actually went to Miami with her kids for what should’ve been a week long trip. It was cut short, though, because she realized that kids aren’t as fun as dancing on bars and puking.

We don’t blame her for feeling that way.

Although she may not know that kids need to be watered daily and doesn’t particularly like being around Sean Preston or Jayden, she isn’t a jerk to them.

In an interview with Ok!, Britney’s former nanny said:

“She is really sweet and loving,” her nanny tells OK!. “She loves her kids, she just not very knowledgeable about the little things…”

The nanny recalls that even though she stopped breast-feeding her youngest, Jayden James, months ago, the caring mom thought she could just pick up where she left off. “Two weeks ago, she thought she could start breast-feeding Jayden again.”

As confounding as it might sound, Britney loves her children, Sean Preston, 17 months, and Jayden, 5 months, and wants only the best for them, those around her insist. “She’s very loving and when they cry she is very patient…”

“She wakes up at two or three in the afternoon, and lives this very free life, where often she’s not wearing many clothes,” her former nanny says. “She’ll be in the bathtub and have meetings, and people just come in there and talk to her…”

“When she comes home at night,” a former employee tells OK!, “she takes them from the nanny and brings them in her room and puts them in bed with her, no matter what time it is.”

Ummm…we thought that everyone knew that you can’t just start and stop breast-feeding whenever you damn well please. If she didn’t know, then someone should’ve told her. Also, we really hope that she doesn’t go to bed naked with her kids. We don’t think she needs to be told how inappropriate that is.

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