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A judge in Los Angeles has sentenced Paris Hilton to 45 days in jail for violating the terms of her probation. Hopefully the Lynwood facility where Paris will be doing her time has plenty of Valtrex on hand in the infirmary.
“I’m very sorry, and from now on I’m going to pay complete attention to everything. I’m sorry, and I did not do it on purpose at all,” Paris siad before the judge announced the sentencing, confirming that she is in fact not smarter than a fifth grader.
Skanks McGee also showed up 10 minutes late to the hearing.
Hilton, who parlayed her name and relentless partying into worldwide notoriety, must go to jail on June 5 and she will not be allowed any work release, furloughs, use of an alternative jail or any electronic monitoring in lieu of jail, Superior Court Judge Michael T. Sauer ruled after a hearing.
Paris has been warned to report to her sentence on time or face 90 days in the slammer.
She does look a little…umm…dumbfounded, walking out of the courthouse after the sentencing.
Maybe she’ll give Michelle Rodriguez a call for some lesbian prison sex tips, like how to make a dental dam out of an old Snickers wrapper or something.
—admin
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