Metadish, Fresh from NYC

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Whatever two people do behind clothes door is absolutely nobody’s business but their own. That doesn’t make it any less awesome when someone is forced to, for whatever reason, publicly put their ultra-kinky fantasies on display for the public. It’s sort of like a train wreck.

Jane Larkworthy, beauty director for W magazine, took the stand for the defense yesterday to read aloud from love letters from Braunstein and describe, in detail, their sex life. When asked if she ever role played with Braunstein, Larkworthy replied, “Yes, because he was into it, and introduced it to me and I derived some kind of enjoyment from it.”

“My arms would be bound with a scarf,” Larkworthy testified. Sometimes, “he would be a patient in a mental institution, and I would be a nurse.

“I got a nurse’s uniform for it,” she told jurors.

Sometimes, Braunstein would pretend to be in his hospital bed, and “I would enter his room and tease him sexually and act like I was in control of the situation.”

Suddenly, the tables would turn. Braunstein would reveal to Larkworthy’s startled “nurse” that he had not taken his medication. “That would lead to sex,” she testified.

Sometimes he’d pretend to force his medications upon his “nurse,” and she’d pretend to be drugged, she told jurors.

Man, I have to start reading W magazine.

In other news, what are the odds that Braunstein’s ex looks as crazy as he does?  It’s like a match made in nutjob heaven.

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