Metadish, Fresh from NYC

Just to make Dane Cook feel more at home I completely stole that headline from Mollygood, but to be fair I totally could have come up with it on my own. Besides, her story is about Dane being a douchebag, this one is about Dane being a thieving douchebag. Totally different.

Joe Rogan and a few other comedians with actual self respect and respect for the craft have been openly calling out hack comics like Dane Cook who steal material and then try to pass it off as their own.

According to Rogan, when he angrily called to demand an explanation, Cook promised to drop the joke. Rogan considered the matter settled. Two weeks later, he caught Cook at the Laugh Factory in Los Angeles performing yet another bit of his, which Rogan had already released on a CD. Rogan, a full-contact Tae Kwon Do champion, says he confronted Cook on the spot. “I said, ‘What the fuck are you doing?’” the comic recalls. “‘You know that’s my bit! You heard me say it! What the fuck makes you think you can take my material and do it onstage?’”

Rogan isn’t the only one who has accused Cook of lifting material. Another veteran comic recalls seeing Cook performing one of his very physical routines at the same club. “I go, ‘Don’t do that bit,’” says the comic, “and [Cook] goes, ‘Oh, sorry man. I won’t do that bit.’ But he did it plenty of times after that.”

And not long ago, comedy-oriented message boards and blogs such as A Special Thing, Redban, and Cringe Humor were jammed with posts claiming that Cook had ripped off comedian Louis C.K., who starred in HBO’s recently canceled Lucky Louie. Posters noted that three bits from Cook’s Retaliation—”Struck by a Vehicle,” “Itchy Asshole,” and “My Son Optimus Prime”—sound remarkably similar to “Guy on a Bike,” “Itchy Asshole,” and “Kid’s Names,” all of which are featured on C.K.’s CD Live in Houston.

And just in case you missed it Rogan got on stage with another comedy thief, Carlos Mencia earlier this year and ripped him a new one. There’s a lot more Mencia stuff over at Redban.

Dennis Leary built his entire career by doing Bill Hicks’ material after he was dead. The problem is the average public doesn’t know enough about stand up or people’s routines to know who’s doing what.

These days it seems all you have to do if you want to become a famous stand-up comedian is hire yourself a stylist, steal some funny jokes and start smoking as much meat pole as Dane Cook and you’re an instant celebrity.

You know the only thing that’s funny about Dane Cook is that he thinks that because people think he’s gay it means “he’s made it”. No asshole, people think you’re gay because you act like a freaking queen.

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