Loading ... 
Let me just preface this post by saying I would never, ever willingly watch this stupid show but I did accidentally catch a few minutes of it while flipping past VH1 trying to find The History Channel or CNN or something. Seriously, that’s the way it happened.
And in just those few moments that I was exposed to, I know my life will never be the same. Scott was talking to a life coach about his problems with women and she asked him (in a moment of complete spontaneity) who was the first person he ever had sex with. His answer? Erin Moran of course. I can’t even bring myself to make a Joanie Loves Chachi joke.
But wait, that’s not even the frightening part. In another completely spontaneous moment, the life coach asks Scott to recount the first time.
Here’s Scott’s account of his first time. “A friend’s apartment. First time…we’re on a couch that is corduroy, and I’m thinking this is really uncomfortable. This is not feeling good at all. And…and I mistook the couch for her. I was making love to a couch. Then all the sudden I found the mark…etc etc..”
OMG! Scott Baio fucked a freaking couch! AND couldn’t tell that it wasn’t Erin Moran’s vagina. There are no words.
And btw, am I the only person who isn’t wondering the obvious here about why Scott is really 45 and single? Joanie might love Chachi but I think Chachi may love the Fonz.
Get the latest Dish by subscribing to the MetaFeed
—admin
Subscribe to Metadish using an 
15 Comments
1. Silent Rick
2. k40
3. Mark
4. trexman
5. James
6. straight and single
7. Virginia Hamm
8. James
9. Algonquin J. Calhoun
10. april
11. caveman
12. SukonmiSkunk
13. Jennifer
14. JC
15. edward mouracade
Want a neat little picture by your comments? Get one here.So, James, you could not care less about this, but chose to write a whole page on what is basically old news?
Can I have your job? It sounds much easier than mine.
Posted Monday, July 16, 2007 at 5:30 pm | Permalink
That’s a very detailed dialouge for someone who was just flipping channels. did you get the transcript emailed to you? or the reality is you had your Tivo record this, as all the other crap you say you don’t watch.
Posted Monday, July 16, 2007 at 6:19 pm | Permalink
45 and single sounds like a man with a lot of common sense, not a homosexual, like you alluded.
Posted Monday, July 16, 2007 at 7:30 pm | Permalink
Hey James…err…I came here to say the same thing the other two guys said, only funnier.
/closet couch banger myself
Posted Monday, July 16, 2007 at 8:11 pm | Permalink
Silent Rick, no you can’t have my job. do you think it’s easy to become a blogging mogul? some days i have to shower!
and k40 since I do have DVR I do have the luxury of seeing something, if even for a moment then pausing it, rewinding it and getting it correct.
Posted Monday, July 16, 2007 at 8:11 pm | Permalink
i am 40 and am not gay- i also watched this show and suffer from the same “commitment” shit Scott does. why is everyone who is not married suspected of being gay? maybe we are just smart.
Posted Monday, July 16, 2007 at 8:47 pm | Permalink
Who are you to judge and why do you care?
Posted Monday, July 16, 2007 at 9:59 pm | Permalink
All the trash I talk about actual relevant people I’m shocked by the sensitive nature of Scott Baio’s fanbase.
Posted Monday, July 16, 2007 at 10:44 pm | Permalink
My buddy was an extra on an episode of “Diagnosis:Murder” and Chachi was supposed to walk up to his hot dog stand and get one. As my buddy recalled, the actor threw a “hissy” fit and did not eat meat so after an hour of the crew sitting around, he compromised by coming to the hot dog stand and ordering a coke on the 16th st mall in denver. Then, he got all upset and went back to his trailer again and after another 2 hours, came back and said I have to have a Diet Pepsi. Seems his agent had called product placement in the meantime. Meanwhile, the scene never saw the life of day and my buddies only scene where he was led off by police in handcuffs…that made it. Chcachi…what a tool.
Posted Monday, July 16, 2007 at 11:27 pm | Permalink
It’s even worse if you’re a woman! I’m 36 and people ask me all the time why I’m single and don’t have kids. It’s NONE of your business! It’s very self centered to think that just because someone isn’t like YOU that they have to be gay or something else is “wrong” with them.
Posted Tuesday, July 17, 2007 at 9:12 am | Permalink
there is no shame in banging a couch, afterall it was courdaroy, (ribbed).
there is however, shame in banging joanie, my god, have you seen that broad, ugly then & now.
Posted Tuesday, July 17, 2007 at 4:57 pm | Permalink
maybe… just maybe.. that first time he fucked.. he actually felt better for rooting a couch.. and ever since then… maybe… just maybe.. hes had a silent fetish for corduroy soft furnishings.. i mean I watch springer.. isnt the US full of weirdo freaks that have sex with all sorts of weird shit???
did no one see the episode where all these old men were in diapers??? theres a place for all weirdos.. they call it HollyWood…
Posted Friday, July 20, 2007 at 1:34 am | Permalink
Scott Baio has no excuse for being single. He is way too picky and thinks hes too good for most women. He thinks he can’t handle a marriage becaue he’s greedy. Now he’s 45 and realizes that he can’t have all the fishes in the sea. He is stupid. Maybe he will learn how it feels when he gets cheated on someday. Watch your back Scotty.
Jenn
Posted Sunday, July 22, 2007 at 4:16 pm | Permalink
Scotts biggest problem is obvious. It’s not commitment as much as it is his friend Johnny. All you have to do is watch this guy around Scott for about a minute. He doesn’t give a shit about Scott but what Johnny may get out of Scott. (ie: woman, an acting job, and women) He wants Scott to stay that imature young kid just looking for a piece of ass because that is the only way Johnny can get a woman. Not once has Johnny listened to Scott and what he wants because Johnny only looks out for himself. Scott, you may be too close to him to see, but Johnny is a user and your name/fame is what he is after. Get him out of your life and do what makes you happy.
Posted Sunday, July 22, 2007 at 10:22 pm | Permalink
hi scott i just saw you o regis and kelly and always wanted to write you for years now it brought back memorys if growing up i remember you as a kid in bklyn and was friends with your brother joey and used to hang out together with you there and wanted to say hi hope your brother is doing welll and tell you how proud i am of your sucess and hope for more to come for you thanks
eddie
Posted Monday, July 23, 2007 at 9:35 am | Permalink
4 Trackbacks/Pingbacks
[…] “MacBook on the coffee table in a 27 foot Airstream in a shitty trailer park”) have received reports that confirm that Scott Baio is a couchfucker. No joke, he mistook a couch for a cooch: Here’s […]
[…] I haven’t actually seen the show, I have a little more self respect that that. But word on the internets is that Baio was so confused his first time he got laid, that he actually fucked a couch. Here’s Scott’s account of his first time. “A friend’s apartment. First time…we’re on a couch that is corduroy, and I’m thinking this is really uncomfortable. This is not feeling good at all. And…and I mistook the couch for her. I was making love to a couch. Then all the sudden I found the mark…etc etc..” …… from MetaDish.com. […]
[…] we could make some kind of chachi loves couchie joke, […]
[…] Scott Baio Is In The News Filed under: Crazy old people, Dumb foreigners, Medical Nightmare, Stupidity on display, Yikes!, Disgusting, News you can use, Jerks, Duh! — eddiebear @ 10:31 am And not for the reasons he would like. […]
Post a Comment